The jerk store just called. They're running out of you.

One day after I lamented the lack of a clever headline on a front page story, the SJ-R references "Seinfeld" over an article announcing Jackie Newman as the new head of the Springfield Housing Authority. Unfortunately, the phrase "Hello, Newman", as it is known to almost everyone, is spoken through clenched teeth with as much scorn as one can muster. It reads that way as well. Hardly an appropriate welcome for a person who has just achieved the business world's version of the American Dream by ascending from the lowest level of the corporate structure (the proverbial mail room) to the position of top executive.