Are you ready for some fütbol ? Probably not, huh?

I must speak briefly in defense of the World Cup.

There seems to be an anti-soccer bias among sports media types who feel the need to mock what they don’t understand. There must be something in the bylaws of the various sportswriters and sportscasters associations of North America that says that all commentary on fütbol must be mocking in nature and will preferably refer to male soccer players in terms normally associated with flittering ballerinas and their fans as barbaric vandals.

When a sports media person does attempt to provide a rational explanation for his dislike of the sport it usually involves the fact that there isn’t enough scoring in soccer. This reason doesn’t hold up to scrutiny.

If your enjoyment of a particular sport is based on frequency of scoring, then it wouldn’t seem possible to be both a fan of baseball and basketball. I haven’t done the research because I’m just a blogger, but I would guess that the discrepancy in scoring between baseball and basketball is much greater than between baseball and soccer. So people who make the low scoring claim should stop the charade and join the others in questioning the sexual orientation of the starting side from Trinidad and Tobago. It’s just more honest.

Closely related to the scoring issue is the claim that there isn’t enough action. Again we should look to baseball where most of the players most of the time are standing there doing nothing. Contrast this with soccer where play rarely stops. There are no Bob Horners or John Kruks playing for Brazil. Every half inning a baseball player can retire to the dugout for a cool drink and a smoke if he so chooses. Soccer players are out there for 90 minutes or until a riot overtakes the field of play, another thing that the pampered baseball players seldom have to confront.

I also suspect that some resentment for this international sport is jingoistic in nature. We Americans are a prideful lot and can be a bit stand-offish when our dominance is tested. It also doesn't help that we've recently had our bat and ball handed to us on the world stage in baseball and basketball. All the more reason, I would think, to rally behind the flag and beat the world at its own game. Although it's too late for that now.

I’m not a rabid soccer fan, but I am quite taken by the sport when I do tune-in. I’m at a loss to explain its spectator appeal. There is a certain grace and rhythm to the sport that creates an artistic symmetry. I guess that’s where all of the nancy-boy talk comes from, we all know how swishy those artists can be.

As a participant, I don’t think I’ve ever enjoyed playing a sport more than soccer.

Growing up on the northend, soccer wasn’t so much frowned upon as unheard of. Only the southsiders played back in 70s, probably because a shortage of good ballet schools in Laketown.* It wasn’t until I got to college that I found myself on the pitch.

I went to a school with a history of national success in soccer (Go Hawks!). Because a good portion of the student body was drawn from the St. Louis area, one of the early booming regions for youth soccer, we had a strong intramural program. I took to soccer immediately. And I still have a scar from when I slid to protect an open goal and placed my leg between the ball and a rather enthusiastic kick. The resulting injury bled quite a bit, but it was a good kind of bleeding.

This isn't to slight other sports. Nothing beats Notre Dame football on an autumn afternoon. While my interest in baseball and basketball has waned considerably over the years, I can still look in from time to time without feeling the need to call a sports radio talk show and vilify its presence on my television.

I now rest my defense of the World Cup and fully expect to be accused of treason, sedition, and other offenses most foul. In other words, it will be rather jovial in the comments section compared to the last several days.

*Notice how I twist that joke back on itself.